Big Girl Bed... What was I thinking?!?

It's been about three weeks since I moved Nya from her crib into her "big girl bed", and thankfully, she has been doing great with it. But those first nights...

A few months before, Nya had been asking for a big girl bed, and after spending a week in a hotel at Disney in their full sized beds without a problem, we decided it was finally time. So once her guardrail came, the crib sides came down and up went her toddler bed.

Nya was ecstatic and couldn't wait to test it out. I was excited for her. I thought this would be a smooth transition, and I wasn't plagued with fear and doubt as my husband apparently was.

How hard can this be??? She's ready for this.

That first night Nya and I talked about what it means to sleep in a big girl bed, and what I expect from her (no getting out). We talked about her cousins and friends that have big kid beds and how she is now a big kid too. We finished our normal bedtime routine (bath, stories, bed); Nya excitedly climbed up into bed herself, I gave her a kiss goodnight, and left her room to her smiling face.

I felt a sense of pride out how easy that just was, and couldn't wait to rub it in Jamie's face.

Five minutes later... 

Nya was up out of her bed screaming for me. Tested. Here we go, I thought.

She was up and out of her bed SIXTEEN TIMES in under ten minutes!

Nya was furious with me. Each time I went into her room, I picked her up and put her right back to bed without a word. I didn't know how long I was going to last, but I knew if I ever wanted this to work, I had to be stronger and more determined than her.

On the sixteenth time of me walking into her room, Nya calmed down and asked me to sit with her. I said, "Thank you for using your words", and held her tight. We sat next to her bed talking about being a big girl and how change can be hard. I then asked her if she would like me to sit with her until she fell asleep, and she said, "Yes, please."

Nya climbed back up into bed and fell asleep in under a minute. Quietly, I left her room, praying this would be it.

The next night Nya climbed into her bed and I sat with her until she fell asleep a few minutes later.

By the third night, it took her a little longer to fall asleep, but she had asked me to stay with her so I did. However, a few hours later, Nya woke up panicked and crying for me, asking where I was.

I stayed with her again until she fell asleep.

By the fourth night, I was seriously questioning what I was doing and was ready to put her crib back into her room. What was I thinking?!?! Exhausted, sleep deprived, and utterly confused, I knew what I was doing was not working... For anyone.

I knew I was making things worse by sitting in her room until she fell asleep, because anytime she woke in the night, she began to panic, wondering where I was. And I also knew Nya was ready for this adjustment and we couldn't go backwards to her crib. Thankfully, Nya never again got out of her crib like she did that first night, but she did cry for me in a panic every time she realized I wasn't there. (At least I had gotten ONE thing right!).

On the fifth day, we had a long talk and I explained to Nya that I was no longer going to sit with her, but that I would watch her on the monitor. She said, "Ok" and it seemed to give her some reassurance.That night, Nya went to sleep by herself without a problem. She stayed asleep, and has not cried out for me again.

That was three weeks ago, but it took sixteen times and four nights to get there.... For now.

I know children are ever-curious and have minds of their own, so who knows what tomorrow will bring? This was just one battle and lesson, in a lifetime of many. Nya will continue to test me to see what her boundaries are, and it's my responsibility to clearly define what I expect from her. I'm glad I didn't give in, as I so badly wanted. But I'm sure I'll be there again, just with a different scenario. Despite the struggle, I'm thankful for overcoming this challenge now (because it was going to happen sooner or later), and I am forever grateful to Nya, for continuing to teach me endless lessons in this life: the importance of patience and the power of persistence. 

How did you transition your little ones into a big kid bed? Did you face any challenges or struggles? Or are you one of the lucky ones that transitioned without a hitch? Please share!

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